TikTok prophet predicts the apocalypse is coming... tomorrow

Blazing Reader,

Another TikTok prophet in a backwards hat is predicting the apocalypse... tomorrow.

Yes, on October 30, the world is going to end. 

Not blow up, mind you. But our digitally supervised life is about to revert back to Little House on the Prairie days. A cosmic combo of super sun flares, wonky Earth vibes and some intergalactic space debris is going to fry every WiFi router, cellphone tower and Bluetooth gadget on God's flat earth.

The man in the video offers no proof for his doomsday claim. Instead, he keeps his TikTok prognostications emotionally charged with an ominous soundtrack intended for a Netflix trailer.

This isn't the first time an online soothsayer has tried to scare us into underground bunkers...

Back in 2023, a similar video went viral, warning that on October 4, smartphones across the USA would emit a signal, activating nanotech injected into people's bloodstreams via the COVID jab. Millions would die instantly, and the unvaxxed would inherit the earth.

To save my vaxxed neighbours from such a fate, I donned all black and became a night burglar, stealing over 300 cellphones from nightstands across my town. 

You can read the story in one of my funniest articles ever.

John C.A. Manley

P.S. September 11, 2041 is when the world ends in my not-meant-to-be-prophetic novel, All the Humans Are Sleeping. Help me prevent such a dystopian future by buying copies for your friends, family and TikTok soothsayers at: AlltheHumansAreSleeping.com

John C. A. Manley is the author of Much Ado About Corona, All The Humans Are Sleeping and other works of philosophical fiction that are "so completely engaging that you find yourself alternately laughing, gasping, hanging on for dear life." Get free samples of his stories by becoming a Blazing Pine Cone email subscriber.